Walt - Emotional Journey
by TheGodmother2
Summary: In season 3, Walt is going through emotional turmoil as the chickens come home to roost. Each week I will do a prequel of Walt's emotional journey paying special attention to his growing feelings toward Vic.
1. Chapter 1

"Walter. Walter." I hear Ruby's gentle voice whispering my name as she slowly rocks my shoulder trying to wake me. My hat is over my face, cowboy style, as I lay on the jail bunk with my frame stretched out for a proper rest. The jail bunk has doubled as my bedroom the past couple of nights but I overslept and Ruby has found my secret.

"Walter, why are you sleeping here?"

"Just worked out that way." I got up and headed for the coffee maker putting on a pot.

I don't know what to do with myself without my best friend. After Martha died, Cady and Henry filled the empty space that time can create. Many a night I drove to the Red Pony for dinner and the company of my best friend. I'm lost without it now. Cady is busy preparing for his defense and I'm not much help until I can find Martha's killer.

Vic should be here any minute. I look forward to seeing her in the morning. I look forward to it more than I should. She strides through the doorway and says hello to Ruby without breaking rhythm and she settles in my office.

"Mornin' Walt. "

"Mornin"

"Any news?"

"No."

This was our regular routine. Nothing to report and nothing to say but so much passing between us.

"k"

As Vic turns to walk out, I grab a package on my desk, "Hey, Vic…ah this is for you."

She spins on her heels and looks at the brown shipping envelope. "Thanks." She pulls out her vintage Benchmade knife, flicks the blade out, and cuts the package open with precision. She reaches in and pulls out Les Bowen's hardcopy book, _The Illustrated History of the Philadelphia Eagles._

"I thought you might like it."

Vic turns and clutches the book to her breasts as if it is a treasure chest. She smiles wide and her eyes radiate happiness. Vic swings her right arm over my neck while still clutching the book and gives me a big hug and lets out a little giggle which is very unVic like but in that moment I realize what it is that makes me so drawn to her. She loves football and Benchmades but she is still a soft and sweet lady that needs attention, protection and love.

I impulsively put my arms around her and welcome her embrace. I find myself smiling as I hug her and I feel safe to do so because she can't see my face which is turning a tiny bit red.

"Thank you, Walt. I love it." She whispers in my ear. Vic steps away and walks over to her desk. She begins to gently turn the pages of the book smiling from ear to ear. I like making her happy. Vic has stayed by my side filling in the empty spaces as much as she can but at night it's the worst. I hate to admit to myself but I am lonely, Lonely for her company, for her laugh and her friendship. I keep my distance if for no other reason than to be as unoriginal as a cliché but she sneaks into my conscious thought and tip-toes through my heart.

Vic interrupts my thought as she sets my coffee cup down in front of me full of fresh brew. "You want me to ride with you to see Henry and maybe get some breakfast?" Before I can stop myself I agree. This too has become our routine. As we walk out of the station Vic takes the lead opening the door for me. I feel weird but remind myself I am not on a date and that thought makes me cringe a little and smile at the same time.

As we walk toward the Busy Bee, Vic points towards Jack's barbershop, and proclaims, "After we eat, why don't I go fill up the Bullet and you let Jack give you a cut and shave. A hot shave will relax you a little bit. You deserve that Walt."

"Nah, Vic that's not really my style."

"Hmmm have you looked in the mirror lately? I mean, I know this is Wyoming but you are about 2 days growth from being Sheriff Grizzly Adams." She laughs at me as I rub my hands over my arguably transient beard. I look down at my boots suddenly filled with emotion. I'm not crying but I feel overwhelmed. Vic steps in and closes the distance, not too close, but close enough so only I can hear her.

"Walt, what's the matter?" She gently puts her hand on my arm.

"You took me back that's all. Martha loved to give me a shave on Sunday afternoon's Jack taught her how to do it with a straight razor and the hot towel. The whole bit. It's a simple thing really but some of our most intimate moments we spent in silence except for the sound of my beard scraping against the razor's edge."

Vic just looked, her eyes glistening over, and she leaned in just a little closer.

"I'm so sorry, Walt. I didn't know."

"It's ok Vic."

I turned back toward the café and knew that I needed to separate myself from this girl because I am giving too much of myself to her. It's becoming too comfortable. The ease of friendship is beautiful and the trust I have is part of the job but my natural concern and care for her is encroaching the fortressed area of my heart. I'm starting to fall in love with my deputy and I never saw it coming.


	2. Chapter 2

**_As we continue through Walt's emotional journey this season_**

I wonder if she knows how she renders me helpless. That little extra lean into my shoulder when she talks. The ease in which she peels back the layers of her masks slowly and lovingly revealing her soul to only me. She makes me feel special, like I am the only one, in a room full of prying eyes. That temper that flares up when she sees an injustice and her confidence of thought and movement excites me. When I am with Vic, I feel a reawakening of my spirit, a rebirth of desire and the passion to live. She gives me permission to relax into myself and forget about the chaos and pain that is interwoven into the patterns of my soul.

I know Lizzie was right the moment she said it because I really am saving it all for Vic. I don't want it spoiled for anyone else. I think I slept with Lizzie to get over Martha and to get over Vic. A distraction that I hoped could work but I knew all along it wouldn't because Vic occupies the open spaces of my heart and my mind.

Sitting on the motel bed I chuckle at the thought of my bad girl in the next room and the endless possibilities if I knock on the door. I chuckle because of the power she wields over my thought and actions. For a fleeting moment I want to forget that she is married and imagine making slow sweet love with her. Just as quick, I snap out of the pleasing thought, and hear a knock on the door that stops me solid dead in my tracks.

My breath escapes my body and for a moment I begin to panic as if she caught me thinking of loving her. I am frozen in fear, in longing, of the possibilities. I move to the door thinking of what to say. Vanity overtakes me as I straighten out my hair. Why? I care what she thinks when she looks at me. I want to show her the acceptance and love she craves. I have it all to give, just for her.

Pretending to be her husband is easy. "Help sell it she says", giving me momentary permission to live where my heart dreams.


	3. Walt- Miss Cheyenne

**_Walt - Following Miss Cheyenne_**

The weight of the world feels pressed between my shoulders and my back is beginning to round from the pressure. I amble to the courtroom and say a silent prayer hoping God will hear me and grant my plea.

"Let Henry go."

The bruises on his face cut deeper than the superficial wounds of punctured skin. His own people, his brothers in tradition, turning on him wound his soul. I know this man as I know myself. I am responsible for him being in jail and I should be the one suffering not him. Cady sitting beside Henry is really how it should have been from the beginning. This is my family. This is whom I will defend and whom I would die for on any given day.

I know the ills we do in this world must be rectified in this world. Some people call it karma and some call it retribution. Some of us like to call it justice. I like to think I want justice and in my own way I genuinely seek it, all the while learning along the way, that my actions have far reaching effects. I alone will not be the only one to suffer from my deeds.

I have to keep moving because if I stop I am afraid my world will not be put back on it's proper axis. I suppose, if I were honest, it's what stopped me from leaning over on that barstool and kissing Vic's sweet full lips and it stopped me again from knocking on the pass through door. I know that if I slight the natural order of things for my self-satisfaction I will suffer but those I love will suffer more. I pull back and know that if it is for us to be then it will be. I can't cheat the future for what has to be right now.

It's simple really but so hard, so hard, indeed.

**_**note, the beauty of this episode with the Miss Cheyenne contest was just magnificent. _**


	4. Walt - In the PInes

**_Following "In the Pines"_**

Vic and I haven't talked about Arizona. I think about what almost happened and as soon as the fantasies rush in I push them out of my mind but it's hard to control when I am sleeping. The subconscious mind is both enemy and ally. The deep desire is present in my dreams and runs parallel with my thirst for revenge in finding who is responsible for taking my Martha from this earth. I have made a very conscious decision that my heart cannot be free to love again until Martha's murder is resolved. I never could love two women at the same time and it was a natural way for me to be faithful. Besides the obvious, that Vic is married, even if she weren't I'm not ready for her. I know this and it keeps me from breaking the rules with her but I know I am bending them and that is just as bad in my book because I want to be ready for her. I know I am in trouble.

When she spends extra time with me I notice and I don't mind even though I know it's wrong. It's wrong because I want her with me, by my side, in my presence. Not to own her but to just be with her even when we are talking about nothing we are talking about everything. Yeah, she does most of the talking but I really enjoy the listening. She is a slow burn. Every word, every syllable is one step deeper inside of her soul and it's a journey I want to take but know I shouldn't and that is part of the dance we do – back and forth -with each other.

Sean comes in through my private door, which I didn't know he knew existed, and bucks up as he confronts me about Vic. The pictures infer what I was thinking of doing that night. I am very guilty of that. My memory is very accurate in recalling her beauty in that Arizona twilight. I would have done the same or worse if I was him and I understand as a man. This girl is trouble, I tell myself, over and over again. The real trouble, of course, is that she is worth it. Every bit of it.

I have to put distance between me and Vic. I don't want to get in the middle of her marriage and I certainly don't want to be in her head distracting her from all that's important. I am surprised when she resists going home but it tells me there is more going on in her marriage than she lets on. I suppose that's how we both got to this place, though, by allowing the time to pass between us. When she tells me that she never went home, I know this is far more serious, and moving too fast for me to get my bearings. I want to ask but I am afraid, no terrified, of the answer. I'm terrified because I'm not ready for this. Vic, slow down. That's what I want to tell her. Get your mind right, Vic. Stop, Vic. Don't blow it, Vic. But I don't say it I just listen to the warnings in my head. I have to listen because I am about to explode with jealousy and anger when she tells me about her past fucking sessions with Gorski. I feel the anger flash across my face and I catch myself. I am not supposed to feel this way. I am mad at her mistakes now being my problems and I am mad at her for sharing her precious body with that piece of shit.

I want to break this fuckin' guy in half. Keep your distance, Walt. Slow down, Walt. Don't blow it, Walt. I retreat into my comfortable kingdom of silence. This is where I'm going to stay as I refocus my attention to where it needs to be in finding Martha's killer and setting my best friend free, forever.

I will slay this dragon. He is an enemy I can defeat. Affairs of the heart that's another beast entirely.


	5. In the Pines - Part 2 - Reviewer request

_**Part 2 -In the Pines - Reviewer request by WaltxVic - I hope you like it.**__ Thank you for all the reviews. They really help to reaffirm I am not alone in my Longvic (That's what I call it) ship._

When Sean walked out of my office, I couldn't sit down. I stood there behind my desk feeling like a fool, as if I had been sucker punched square in the jaw. My heart is beating like I had been caught red handed. I am caught and that's the real problem here. Victoria, has captured my attention. She has captured my affection. I have to fix this and make this right.

As I drive down the highway headed to the Ferg, the negative whispers of doubt creep into my conscious thought. What a fool you are ol' boy for paying her any attention. This is the game she plays. Why should you be different? What a fool you are to want her. Your instincts are all wrong.

I sit silent and just listen neither confirming nor denying their accuracy. My heart is beating in my throat like a man about to make a confession. As Vic and I amble down the wooded trail, I hope for silence. I can't speak to her right now. I have to reassess my position and withdraw from the engagement that we do with each other. What a fool I am being for wanting her. Vic, calls me out on my silence and before I can stop I tell her about Sean's visit. I know I need to tell her. I know I need to remove myself as a distraction. I can't cheat the future. I can't cheat the natural order of things. I must make this right.

Ferg alerts us and we find the wounded hiker. I know I should call the Search and Rescue team. That's what they train for. That's what they live for but hell no that's not what I do and halfway down the mountain I slip because I lose focus as the negative whispers remind me that I am a fool for wanting to impress her. If she weren't here Walt would you have waited? What's with the rope burn comment, Walt? Does she really have plans for your tall-boy or is she just a tease? Did she talk like this with Gorski or is this special just for you? Bet it's not, Walt. Bet she's been down this road a million times, Walt.

I grapple and fight to stop hearing my doubts, my fear and my embarrassment. When she confesses about room 32 I can feel my feelings on my face. The rage inside boiling like a jealous lover. I am mad at her. I want to know if she is toying with me and if she is the danger in this game. I am mad at myself for being in this position. I have cheated with Vic. That is the truth. I have cheated in my heart and in my head. Lizzie knew it to be true and called me on my bullshit. I am an interloper. I am putting a stop to this right now.

_I'm leaving. I don't want to be here with you with Sean gets here._

I hear myself say the right thing but I want to grab her and hold her and tell her it will be all right. Vic, I will protect you. You are safe with me. Vic, I love you more for telling me the truth and for showing me all the creases and blemishes. I want to tell her thank you for trusting me. For letting me see this ugliness and letting me decide. I want to love her and not just for now but forever. I know I can't. I know I won't so I amble out of the room to disappear. I'm not running from Sean I'm running from the love I have sewed up inside that is replete in my heart. I know that we both have to go about the business of administering justice. The proper disbursement for Martha and to Gorski, justice is coming. When it lands all will be right with my world.

Just hold on, Walt. Be true, Walt. Stay the course, son. You are lucky to get a love like this once in your life. You've had it ol' boy. You know what it looks like, tastes like and feels like. You know this is real but be patient, be kind, don't be a distraction. Justice is coming and with it love.


	6. Wanted Man

**_Walt's journey continues –after Wanted Man_**

**_**Spoilers***_**

My pursuit is relentless. My will cannot be broken. It's time. Time for me to finish what I started two years ago in Denver and exact justice for my sweet Martha. This focus has allowed me to channel the energy and not let Vic be a distraction to my thoughts and deeds.

_Ethos anthropos daimon_.Character is fate.

My character will determine my fate with Vic. My character will not allow me to travel deeper with her while she is a married woman. Sean really has nothing to worry about from me or from her which tells me he does not understand his wife. Not in the least.

Lucian understands my code. He is cut from the same cloth. I am glad he is by my side and is traveling this part of the journey with me. A violent death._ A violent death. _His words echo in my mind. Martha's fate was determined by external evil forces. Forces hell bent on punishing me. They were true to their character but they must also know that I will be true to mine and be rigorous in my pursuit no matter how delayed.

The pain it has caused cannot be measured. It cannot be restored but I will not let this pass and I too will exact pain and anguish. Enough for a lifetime. This one and the next.

Vic's questions about Philly resonate with me and I understand our kinship, perhaps more than she ever will, as I understand who she is at her core and I know that is why I love her. Stupid choices she made in her youth were just her unwitting attempts to find herself and be true to her spirit. She aligned herself with the wrong guide, in Ed Gorski, something not so strange with the blindness of youth. She is here now. With me now. I am a proper guide. I have traveled her road. She is safe with me. She will always be safe with me. Vic, at heart, will always choose right over wrong. Good over evil. She is true to those she loves and that is something more for me to love about her. She will never replace Martha but then again she is not meant to replace her.

Just as character is fate, water seeks its own level, and I am a man who needs to love the right woman. Vic and I will be partners for a lifetime in one way or another.

My prayer is that I survive the battle and not bury any more of those I love.

Evil will be defeated, at my hand, of this I am sure.

In this lifetime.


	7. Wanted Man Part 2

**_**Part 2 of the emotional journey that Walt is going through from my perspective. There was so much going on in last night's episode. I hope this resonates with folks. Your reviews are very much appreciated.**_**

As I stand in my office reflecting on the past, I think of the routine happiness I miss so. Simple things, like saying good-bye, in the morning, the freshness of laundry hanging to dry and my sweet Martha praying me safe.

God, I miss her. No marriage is perfect. Nope, not one but I was happy and I like to think she was too. She never complained about the hours I worked, the time I spent away, or waking up in the middle of the night while my mind went 100 miles per hour trying to put the pieces of a case together. How do you find that kind of love once in a lifetime, let alone, twice in a lifetime? I don't think you do. I think you just survive and if you are truly lucky you have glimmers of happiness and hope.

There is just an ache and a sadness of losing your love to violence. There is a peace with natural death that I will never have in losing Martha and I failed to protect her in Denver. I didn't see the danger coming. I still fail her by not capturing justice for those responsible but as I stand here at this wall of suspects I vow with every fiber of my being that I will be relentless in my pursuit.

Vic interrupts my thoughts. I don't know what to do with her except for nothing. It sounds odd but I want to talk to Martha about Vic. I have wrestled with the Freudian interpretation of that desire but the funny thing is I think Martha would like Vic. She sure as hell wouldn't have liked Lizzie. Martha was more like Vic in knowing who she was as a woman, she prided herself as an independent thinker, and she definitely was smarter than I in so many ways was but in the quiet moments when we were alone, in our most intimate moments, she liked being a soft gentle woman and me taking the lead. She liked having a man as a husband and I enjoyed being that for her. I never would feel that way with Lizzie and I knew it was all-wrong from the get go.

Vic is tough with a mouth to match her brawn but in the we small hours, she is a soft gentle woman who needs a man, a strong man, and as much as I push it out of my brain, she needs me.

I compartmentalize my thoughts, something that is an advantage for the male of the species, and continue my pursuit for justice. Patience of the heart is a virtue and fortunately, it is a virtue I am flush in spades.


	8. Pop 25

**_I finally watched Population 25 (Ode to Craig Johnson) and this fic is from Walt's point of view in the last scene and what I would love to happen next._**

I am willing to risk everything and lose my life. At this moment, I am neither a patriot nor a tyrant, but a man whose choices have led to this moment. I have made the choice to throw the rulebook aside, to suffer the criticism and the blame from others for my actions. That is what men like me do. That is what leaders like me do. I've never seen Vic helpless before and it momentarily jars me. I know she will fight. I know she will resist. I need her to trust me in this moment. When Gorski comes out to rescue her she has to feel my heart in my voice that I am willing to make a pact with the devil to save her. There are many demons that I face and very few that are worthy adversaries but this night is different.

I am standing tall not just for Vic but also for Martha. I need answers and I need them now. If Chance didn't kill Martha it narrows down the possibilities and puts me one step closer to administering justice. I beat down the voice in the back of my head that whispers to stop. Stop and wait for the troops, Walt. You don't have to do this, Walt. The voice comes quietly but I won't let him stay this time. It's all up to me. It's always been and it always will be. I think of how Vic must feel at this moment looking at my silhouette, hearing only my voice, as I think she has 3 men who love her and I think how she made pretty good choices considering. Gorski has brass and guts though he took a decidedly wrong turn but he's here now and that counts for something in my book. There's Sean, the man I can never be, but a man that loves his wife enough to call me.

Vic, is my deputy. My love for her transcends romantic notions and I know my purpose as I negotiate with Chance. Chance is a very worthy opponent but I have the advantage because while Chance can understand the gesture of a duel he cannot understand the depth of my love. He cannot understand that I am willing to die for someone not just an ideal. The love I have for heart and home is the same love that pulsed through the veins of my forefathers and made the ideal of freedom possible. As Vic passes by me, my eyes follow because she has to know I take my stand for her. I honor her through my actions and deeds the only was I know how. My window of opportunity and position of advantage may be extraordinarily slim but it is there and I seize the moment.

At the hospital, Sean thanks me for rescuing them. He is understandably emotional but quieter than usual. I don't press it as I know the man's disdain for me. Sean encourages me to see Vic. "She needs to see you Walt." I leave Sean's room and catch the Doc in the hallway.

"Hey Walt. They both got pretty banged up. Sean has facial lacerations and we are keeping him for observation for a possible concussion."

The Doc can read my face despite my poor attempts to hide my concern for Vic.

"Vic, definitely the worse of the two. Concussion, lacerations, and an all around pissed off demeanor." Doc jokes a bit trying to lighten up the ominous mood.

"Doc, she will be ok?"

"Yes, Walt she will be ok. Fortunately, the only assault was physical and not sexual as well. "

I lightened at his words with the sense of relief that a man has for the woman he loves.

"Thanks, Doc. Ok, if I see her?"

"Absolutely, Sheriff."

I push the door gently open with hat in hand. Vic lays on the hospital bed and looks over at me, a single tear drains from her face. My defenses are worn but I know I must not cross the line although it would be so very easy to do. My smile is faint as I walk over to the bed.

"We gotta stop meeting like this", I joke.

"Yeah or my husband will think I like getting shot with bear tranquilizers and kidnapped by extremists just so I can have alone time with you."

I smile to hold back the pain and without hesitation pull back the long blonde wisps' of hair that had fallen into her eyes. I think of her falling into my arms after she roared back to Chance's fortress and of her confession.

"Are you going to explain why Gorski was there?"

"I will some other time. Right now, you need rest. I just want to let you know that I am here." I retreat to the unique quiet calmness of my mind and hold my love for her tight in my heart.

"I will always be here."


	9. The Aftermath - Harvest

_**Walt's take on the Harvest. So many Walt/Vic feels. I hope my Longvic shippers enjoy. I look forward to hearing from you. You guys are wonderful.**_

_**Spoilers**_

I wish the doc had a fix for the broken pieces inside instead of just needle and thread for the freshly torn flesh on my arm. I can see the inner turmoil and the pain in Vic's eyes and I want to fix it and make her whole. My best sales job doesn't convince her everything will be ok as she fingers the hole from the bullet on my jacket. That badge has cost me a lot and it nearly cost me my life, again. I take her hand because I need to touch her, told hold her, to make sure she is real. As she sobs in my arms, revealing her soft and vulnerable underbelly, I am honored because it means she feels safe with me. She knows I not only can protect her I am willing to protect her. Allowing herself to be weak with me is the truest demonstration of her love but with it comes concern because she should be like this with Sean and she hasn't even mentioned his name.

I want to love her. I know I do and I catch myself stroking her hair and pulling it back because I want to kiss her but I can't because she belongs to another man. Instead, I try to be the best friend I can be, and comfort her in my arms. Despite my conscious attempt, I know that things will never be the same between us as we move ahead in the shadow of the showdown.

As the hours fade into the next day, I am surprised that Vic is at work; given the circumstances I would think she would take time to be with Sean. A life and death situation has a weird way of pulling your loved ones closer and whatever problems they were having before most likely will be forgotten. The fact that she is here makes me believe that she is in a bad place right now and as a man, I wonder how it would be to be her husband. Does Sean know how to love her? I know that I have to give her what she needs whether that is space, an ear, or a shoulder.

We settle into our normal routine of discussing a case over take-out. Nothing new but the conversation turns into the last words I ever expect or want to hear, "Two weeks notice." The prospect of Vic leaving feels like I have been sucker punched and my bell is rung creating a temporary daze but I know I have to guard my heart, my feelings, and can't do anything to influence her decision to stay. I can't distract her from focusing on her marriage. It wouldn't be right to confuse her. It's not right that I feel this way about her. It's not right that I love a married woman never mind the fact that she is also my deputy but the thought of losing her is almost too much for me to bear.

Each moment her desk is empty feels like another nail being pushed into my coffin. I struggle to breathe thinking of the prospect of her gone. The loss of a colleague, the loss of a good friend, another lost love, and I can feel my steely veneer cracking but I have to keep it together. As I open my door, I see her behind my desk, and the compulsion to smile is quickly replaced by dread when I see the plain white envelope bearing my name. The moment is here. She is leaving. I don't want to face it. My stomach drops. Is this what men feel like before the execution squad? Before the hangman drops the lever? Because I feel like I am dying all over again as I felt when Martha was taken from me. I didn't have a chance to say good-bye to Martha and I can't say good-bye to Vic in the way I want to say good-bye. Cowboy-up, Walt. Take the damned letter. Why is she sitting in my chair taking liberties like drinking my beer. My knees won't allow me to stand so I sit by the light and begin to read as Vic pauses at the door. I re-read the first 3 sentences twice because it's not a resignation letter. It's not my life walking out of the door. The Governor stayed my execution. I have another day to live.


	10. Preview - Counting Coup

**_"_****_Counting coup, or striking an enemy, was the highest honor earned by warriors participating in the intertribal wars of the Great Plains."_**

_A preview of what I would like to see in tomorrow night's episode. I never thought I would say that Monday's can't come fast enough, right! Anyway, I will finish up a couple of chapters later today, but this will get it started. Have a wonderful Sunday._

* * *

I want to ask Vic if she is staying but I played my hand so I keep my mouth shut. I let her letter speak for itself. If she is taking the time to be candid about Branch I figure she has made her decision and will allow her actions to speak for her. None of us can escape who we really are all we can do is attempt to control our true being often times in small doses. Vic can't control exposing the truth for what it is even at the detriment to herself. She did it in Philly and she is doing it again, here in Durant. Now her questions become clear, her self-doubt, and anguish over this exposure. I was right about her then and I am right about her now but I also know that just as in Philadelphia her decision will come at a great price. A personal price.

As the Sheriff, my job is to prevent this from starting a war, a war between my deputies. A war that can cause my office to self-destruct. How do I contain Branch? How do I contain Vic? I've tried to talk to Branch but obviously it isn't helping. The trouble is; I understand the pain he is in, I know what the burning anger of seeking justice and revenge tastes like. I know first-hand, the fire that is consuming him, and will eventually destroy him. My obligation to him as the Sheriff is paramount but my obligation to him as a man, a fellow warrior, is of higher importance.

Vic left my office, walking out of the private door, without saying another word. I pick-up the telephone and dial the last number I want to call.

A baritone angry voice picks up.

"Do you know what the hell time it is? This better be important."

"Ah, Barlow, it's ah Walt Longmire. I need to talk to you about Branch."

"Did you get him hurt again?"

"No, he's not hurt but I do need to speak with you. I apologize for calling so late but I didn't feel it could wait until morning."

I arrive at Barlow's prestigious digs and knock on the heavy custom oak and glass French doors.

Barlow, dressed in a polo and slacks, opens the door.

"What's so damned important, Sheriff."

"Have you talked to Branch, lately?"

"On occasion, why?"

"I'm worried about him. Ever since he was shot he has been …well…not really himself." I pause searching for the right words. Not wanting to make a great enemy out of Barlow and trying to find the right words for a father to help his son.

"He still rambling about that dead guy."

"David Ridges"

"Yeah, that's the name."

"We uncovered evidence that David Ridges may be in fact still alive. I do believe he is still alive."

"Well what have you done to capture the sonofabitch that tried to kill my son!?"

I feel my hand instinctively go up to my head. "We are aggressively pursuing every angle Barlow but I was hoping you could maybe talk to Branch. He is making decisions that will affect the rest of his life. I think maybe he needs to spend some time with you."

"Longmire, you must be in one hell of a predicament if you come asking for my help especially when it comes to my son."

"Barlow, listen, this isn't about you or me, it's about Branch. He is still my deputy."

Barlow studies my eyes. He pauses and looks down at his loafers reflecting his options.

"All right, Longmire, I will see what I can do."

I put my hand out to shake his refusing to avert my focus.

"I wouldn't blame you if you slapped it away."

Barlow studies me again.

He shakes my hand and I see my way out of his grand estate.


	11. Preivew Counting Coup - Chapter 2

I hop back into the Bullet and look at the estate in my rearview as I drive out of the elongated driveway. Barlow was always a bit rough around the edges just like his brother. Sometimes it's hard to believe he and Lucian are blood brothers but when you think about it down deep they are just flip sides of the same coin. Both privileged, both cantankerous, and both definitely their own men. Barlow has never been particularly fond of me and the feeling has been mutual all of these years. It never helped that I am more of a brother to Lucian than he is and never aspired to climb the socioeconomic ladder. Money has never impressed me as much as character and I would rather be rich in the latter than the former. I know the last election sits like a bitter lemon in his craw but we have to put that aside for Branch's sake.

The stillness of the pitch black Wyoming night quiets my thoughts and settles my soul. I darken the doorway to my cabin and instantly notice the steady red flash on the answering machine.

I hit the button, "You have one message"

The familiar feminine voice barks into the phone, "Hey, Walt sorry to call so late, it's me. Listen, I need to take a vacation day tomorrow. I will assume it's okay unless I hear back from you. Ok, ok, thanks." There is a momentary pause, "Hey, I hope you aren't sleeping at the station, again. I will call there just in case. I need you to get this message. Ok, bye for real."

Hearing Vic's voice on the machine is a reminder of the turmoil I ignore. My gut drops as I wonder why she needs the day off. Is she packing? Is she leaving? Is she job hunting? I don't think she is leaving not after the explosive letter she gave me. Hell, she would take more than a day off, Walt. She would tell you if she was leaving you. Leaving me? What an odd way to put it. Sigh. I promise myself not to think about her or it, whatever the it is that is passing between us, and plop down on the couch. I begin to fade and my mind harkens back to my unscripted need to hold her at the hospital, to hold her in my arms, for reassurance and also to really finally acknowledge to myself that I need her. So much for not thinking about her.

Life's confirmations come at such odd moments and in unexpected places. On my knees, in the middle of nowhere, next to Ed Gorski I realized that Vic is much more important to me than I ever imagined. My threat to Ed was very real and I made it before I thought about it but what I never expected was the swelling of emotion as she avoided watching me getting stitched up and the need for me to have her in the room with me and the overwhelming desire to just be with her.

I lay on my back with the back of my arm resting on my forehead. Completely at an emotional standstill. Having gotten over the shock that she may leave, a part of me wants her to go. A part of me wants her to make her marriage work and leave this God forsaken job behind. I want Vic to be happy and Lord knows I do not want to interfere with her marriage. I know I hurt her with my callous response but it was necessary. One day she will see that and understand. I know she will. She's a smart girl.

As I drift off to sleep, I think of why I feel this pulse and desire for Vic, it's not like anything I have really felt before. She is pretty, she is smart, she is brassy but she is also my deputy and decidedly younger. My life is complicated enough between Henry's freedom, Martha's justice and Branch's sanity I don't want another complication. This is the lie I tell myself to make it through the night.


	12. Preview - Counting Coup Chapter 3

I hit the front door of my office and Ruby has a host of post-its waiting for me. "Walter, it's just you and Ferg today. Vic called in a vacation day and Branch did too. I don't want to hear any complaining they both have needed time off for a long time. Now I know you want to get to Denver but it will have to wait until tomorrow. Now, I'm sorry but that's just the way it's going to be today." I chuckle to myself happy that the plan seems to be working out and I hope that Barlow reached out to his son.

I make it through the day and finalize my plans for Denver the next day. I'm going come hell or high water. No more delays. Martha is first and foremost in my mind. As I wrap up for the evening, Vic comes sauntering into the station and into my office.

"Thanks for letting me have the day off, Walt"

"Sure." I pause not quite sure how to read her casualness, "Everything ok?"

"Yeah, it's fine. I guess."

I want to ask her what's wrong but I don't know what she will say. I have avoided probing since she dropped the potential resignation bombshell. Vic turns and starts to walk out of my office as I stand in no-man's land between my desk and the door. She turns, "Walt, can I ..uh…talk to you?" She looks almost helpless.

"Sure"

I sit on the edge of my desk, my legs crossed at the ankle, and my arms folded.

"I left last night to drop Sean off at DIA, the drive to Denver and back is an ass-kicker. He left for Australia and um it's a one-way ticket."

Still unsure, "Are you ..ah…"

"I'm staying here, Walt. At least for now. My marriage is over. It's been over for some time really." She holds her arms close to her chest. I instantly feel guilty for feeling so good about the words I hear filling the air.

Holding her head down, "I ..um…I…" Vic pauses and looks at me. "I don't think he could take being married to a cop anymore and I can't imagine doing anything else and that shit at crazy fucks house was the icing on the cake."

"Vic, I am really sorry. ..if you need more time off…we will be ok here. Maybe you could join Sean and try to work it out."

"He didn't ask me to join him, Walt "

I hold my head down wondering how in the hell Sean could ever let her go and leave without her but I don't dare express the interworking of my mind.

"Walt, you know I haven't really said anything to you but there is something that has really been on my mind and well fuck now is as good a time as any to get it off of my chest."

Terrified. I just stand there and wait.

"I know you are hot and heavy with your investigation in Denver but damnit Walt why are you excluding the rest of us? Why are you excluding me? Let me help."

I want to grab her because I realize now more than ever she is one of the best friends I will ever have and whatever this is that is passing between us will have to wait. It will have to wait for another day.


	13. Preview Counting Coup Chapter 4

"Vic, I appreciate the offer but this is really a personal matter and not a county matter."

"What?"

"I told you before it's not the right thing to do. Doing this on the clock."

"We all know how my last 3 day weekend turned out and if you took that shit out of my vacation bank you're going to have a lot more to worry about than some psycho killer in the mile-high city."

"Vic, I can't ask…" she interrupts me.

"Walt, stop being so fuckin' stupid. Even the Duke had help. How many times have you seen Rio Bravo? If Feathers doesn't grab the shotgun the Duke is dead. So shut it." Her eyes glare at me and she walks over to the felony flat wall. Arms folded, feet spread, she's ready. "What have you go so far."

Quickly realizing I will not win this battle, "Well, I think someone out to hurt me hired this meth-head, Miller Beck, to kill her and make it look like a robbery gone bad."

"Ok, why would someone want to do that? They have something to lose or something to gain, right?

"Right. That could be personal satisfaction in hurting me which is why I think Malachi and Jacob Nighthorse are involved in this somehow."

"David Ridges?"

"And David Ridges especially since he killed Hector. Hector, the one man who could have saved Henry."

"Ok let me get this straight. You think Malachi and Jacob Nighthorse conspired and had Martha murdered all the way in Denver and used David Ridges and this Darius guy as henchmen."

"Something like that" I hear myself smack my teeth. It's a habit I have developed lately when I put the pieces together in my mind.

"Walt, since this is my time and not county time, I'm not your deputy. I'm your friend."

I turn to face her not sure what's coming next. My hands rest easy on my hips.

"Yup"

"Ok, have you considered that Martha was the target and not you all along?"

I hold my head down concentrating on my ropers. Vic, confirming just how smart she is.

"Yup"

"What would have made someone so angry they would kill her Walt?"

"Money"

"As in casino money?"

"Yup"

"Which leads us back to Malachi and Nighthorse"

I shake my head in the affirmative.

"Walt, ok, look I get where you are going with the conspiracy theory but shit Walt you know there's no way 4 crazy motherfuckers can keep these kinds of secrets for so long. I'm not buying it. Who else stands to profit or who else stands to lose?"

The corners of my mouth turn up just a bit because that super brain of her is in overdrive.

"Barlow Connally"

"Motherfucker. Connally construction!"

"Yup" I walk over and close my office door, despite the lateness of the hour, as I can never be sure who will walk in.

"Vic, if the casino wasn't approved then Barlow would stand to lose tens of millions of dollars of profit in the construction of the casino. Martha was a vigorous opponent of the casino and that made enemies."

"How did that make you feel as Sheriff?"

I am blind-sided by her question but look down over my shoulder at the top of her head while she stares at the suspect wall. Her question rocks me just a bit but the fact that I want to tell her the truth about my feelings rocks me even more.

"As Sheriff, I had to be careful to be transparent in any dealings with the Rez. I was more flexible in my dealings with them because I didn't want them to think I was using the influence of my office in anything political."

"How did it make you feel as a man. As her husband?"

This time I looked at her until she looked back.

"Proud."

Vic's face softened and she turned back toward the wall. I felt her fingers on my hand and I didn't know what to make of it. She stared at the wall as she spoke.

"Walt, I am so sorry for all of the pain and for losing Martha." She grabbed two of my fingers and held onto them. "Whether you realize it or not you have a lot of people who care for you and who love you." Now she had my whole hand in hers, " You are my best-friend." She turned to face me. "Now me and the rest of those that care about you and love you are going to help you get these motherfuckers."


	14. Preview Counting Coup Chapter 5

I look down at our hands and see that she isn't wearing her wedding ring. There is a pronounced white band where the ring blocked the sun from her tanned skin.

"Thank you, Vic." I release her hand and we get back to business. I can feel Martha's spirit moving about. I feel comforted and somewhat foolish standing here facing the wall with Vic. I feel foolish because I have had the love and support of true friends this entire time. The love and care of a brilliant daughter but instead of reaching out to them I bottled it all up inside. I stuff it down. I don't know why I'm like this. I just am. I am not particularly interested in changing it but I think I should pay more attention to how it affects those around me. My Martha was so smart and so brave. She knew how to draw it out of me much like Vic does.

"If Barlow is caught up in this somehow are you thinking Ridges shot Branch to get back at Barlow?"

Before I could answer, Vic says, "But why? Why get back at Barlow or is Branch involved?"

"I don't think Branch is involved but I wasn't convinced until he started down his own war path to seek revenge for Ridges. I think Branch is another victim in this whole thing."

Vic listens intently.

"After Branch was shot, I paid Barlow a visit, and told him that he may be the intended target. That Branch was shot…as you know…a way of getting back at him." Vic hangs on my every word. Her dark mahogany eyes are almost looking through me. "Vic, he wasn't fazed one bit. He made some cursory threat but he sure didn't act like a man that was surprised at the thought."

"Walt, have you considered that Barlow paid this Miller Beck freak to kill Martha because of her actions to stop the casino and all of the involvement with the Rez is well just coincidence?"

"I have."

"And"

I smack my teeth, again.

"I just don't know. Every time I get close someone gets dead."

I turn to Vic, "I haven't talked to anyone about all of this. Not even Henry knows my theory about Barlow. I sorta can't believe I'm talking to you about it."

She smiles and looks down. "But here's the deal. This is a powder keg. You have to be careful, Vic. I don't trust anyone with this information because I don't know who all is involved."

My voice doesn't project the rest of my thought, "because I nearly died when I lost Martha and I surely will if I lose you, too."

Vic turns back to the wall, her face flushes, as if she can hear the words in my head.

"Ok, let's talk this one out"

She starts, "Martha says hell no to the casino. She pisses powerful people off."

"Barlow, Malachi and Nighthorse all have something to lose namely money. But I arrest Malachi and he is in prison when Martha is murdered."

"Ok, but he has the long arm of the Brotherhood, so he can still be the power broker behind the whole thing."

"Yup"

"Why shoot Branch? What would they warn Barlow about by shooting him?"

"That's where I get stuck unless Barlow was going to spill the beans about what happened in Denver?"

"Why, why would he do that if he is so deeply involved?"

"Dunno"

"You think it has something to do with Branch?"

"Dunno"

"Where did Branch get all of his money for the campaign? He made a point of not taking his Dad's money."

The room is silent as we both think. Vic moves over to her customary position in the visitor's chair and I turn and take my chair once again scraping the tip of my ropers as I fold my long legs under the chair.

"Nighthorse. He sponsored Branch."

"Walt, sounds a bit crazy but you know what if Barlow didn't like Nighthorse getting his hooks into Branch. After all Branch is his only son and heir to the Connally name. All that macho aristocratic bullshit may have caused him to say something. Ok for Daddy to be corrupt but not his spawn. Something like that."

My hand comes up to my head and I smooth my hair down. I look over at Vic, thinking.

"Possible. Still, why shoot Branch?"

We sit in silence until I break it.

"Unless, Nighthorse went to Barlow and told him to contain Branch. Branch knew that Ridges was behind Cady's car accident. He figured it out on his own and only told me because Mathias caught him on the Rez investigating Ridges." I stand up and put my hand on the wall.

"In fact, Branch told Nighthorse about his suspicions."

Vic interjected, so "Nighthorse had Ridges fake his suicide and then have him shoot Branch as a warning to Barlow?"

"A warning to both."

"Branch goes on a psychedelic trip and Barlow shuts his face?"

"But I still don't get how the Rez is involved in Denver with Martha?"

"I think Barlow acted independently in Denver. When Nighthorse found out about it he contacted Malachi. Malachi has connections on the outside through the Brotherhood. Darius or Ridges went to Denver to clean up Barlow's mess with Miller Beck. Unbeknownst to them, I was there and later so was Henry, but one of them killed Miller Beck to cover for Barlow hiring him in the first place. Now, Barlow is in thick as thieves and has to play along with their game. Except, he wasn't expecting Nighthorse to cultivate Branch and that crossed the line. Barlow threatens to unravel the whole thing unless Nighthorse backs off and well that didn't go too well. They send a message to Barlow by shooting Branch."

"Shit, Walt. Where's Branch?"

"I asked Barlow to talk to him. To talk some sense into him."

"What the fuck? Why, after what you just said."

"First, because Branch needs to not be here. Second, because I am hoping that the pieces fall in place."

"Who the fuck knew?"

I look at her with a raised eyebrow that posed a silent question.

"Who the fuck knew, you skinny baggy jeans wearing Cary Cooper throwback motherfucker, were the baddest motherfucker in the county? Shit, Walt. I think you're right."

* * *

_**Just my fun theory. Enjoy the show tonight. I can't wait. I look forward to reading your feedback and back to more Longvic shipping after tonight's episode. Have a happy Monday!**_


	15. Counting Coup - Afterward

**_Counting Coup -for real, though. Serious spoilers. Serious Walt and Vic shipping. As always, thank you for your reviews. I hope you enjoy the interpretation._**

I avoid asking the only question I want to ask her, "Are you staying?" I don't want to think about her. At all. I can't afford to lose my focus and lose my way. All the cards are crashing down like meteors over my head. I am responsible for everything and it's my fault that Branch is in so much trouble, it's my fault that Ferg has been left out, and I am certainly culpable for my feelings for Vic. I can't let the house crash down around my feet and have everyone destroyed in the process.

This burden is heavy. The new growing love and the true existing love that I carry in my heart have me conflicted and they are tearing me apart. I love Martha. I will always love Martha. As the days pass, the pain lessens but the pain is still there and it is still very much a part of who I am as a man. The past weeks have ripped open the scabs that hold my fractured heart together and as I get closer to who is responsible for Martha's murder it bleeds a little deeper and a little longer. My desire for Vic sometimes feels like salt in the wound and at other times like a healing salve.

At Chance's I knew so clearly what to do and in many ways I didn't care if I lived or died. I didn't care until I looked into Vic's crying eyes at the hospital. Her tears were for me, not for the situation she was spared, they were unselfish tears just for me to see. My compulsion to touch her, too hold her, ignited the slow simmer hidden away. I never want to let her go. I didn't in the hospital and I don't now. My primal desire to protect Vic billows over when Branch flares and she stays on the forefront of my mind. I need to protect her. I need to be there. Nothing can happen to her. My judgment can't be clouded. I'm in trouble because she can so very easily be a distraction. I have to keep this inside.

I've pushed aside Sean's divorce papers. How can I tell her? Sean's idea of irony does not escape me nor does Ruby's coyness. How in the hell and I going to tell her? I don't want to be the vessel for more pain. I have already caused enough.

I stand before her and start clumsily not sure of my footing. I tell myself just say it. Just give her the papers, Walt. Just do it. You don't have a choice. All of this resonates in my mind as I think how much I don't want her to walk out of the door. How much I want her to stay and not just as my deputy. I want her to be mine but I need her to be patient. I need her to wait for me. I need to be ready and be my best for her. The only way that will happen is if I resolve Martha's murder.

As she sits and reads her divorce papers, I wrestle with the timing of my coming admission, but if I don't say anything now I never will so I summon the courage to tell her that I want her to stay. I hold my breath until she finally looks up at me, her eyes large with revelation, and the corners of my mouth rise with relief. I pause and think how we have switched roles, last week she handed me a letter she didn't want to give and this week I had her a letter I didn't want to give but in the end we both stay true to who we are despite the pain, the anguish and it is clear to me that I want to continue my journey with her.

There will be time for us, Vic. Be patient and wait for me. Those thoughts permeate my consciousness but I dare not speak another word. I have said enough already.

On my quest to find Ridges I take the time to resolve my mind and prepare to face a killer when Ferg interrupts the locomotive of thoughts letting me know that Branch is on the loose. My first and immediate thought is of Vic. She didn't go home to Sean. She signed the papers and she means to stick to it. It pleases me that she locked herself in my office, that I am her safe haven, all of the time. I re-shift my thoughts to confront an enemy. I should have expected an OIT but damn it Ridges got the drop on me.

I recognize the White Warrior. This is it, ol' boy. There is a moment where I think if this were two years ago I would not run. I would die an honorable death. The thought flees because I have someone to live for, someone to protect, and someone to love. I will fight for my chance to live again. Counting coup, indeed.

_**Robert Taylor killed it in this episode. Looks like he did his own stunts. As my girl TayTa1895 says he is a BAMF**_


	16. Counting Coup Chapter 6

_**The mystery continues. Walt's not done counting coup. These are my crazy theories and the workings of my imagination. Hope you enjoy. I will finish up the chapters before Monday's finale. **_

Vic and I wrap up the evening and say good night. I want to thank her for being true but I don't know quite how to say the right words so I mutter a pathetic, "Thanks, Vic, for everything."

She nods and leaves. I really want to chase after her, in the literal sense, but I resign to the reality of my life. I can't offer her what she needs, not right now, and I want her to be ready too. I decide to sleep at the station and get a fresh uninterrupted start in the morning.

Ruby gently knocks on my door and lets herself in. I don't know why she knocks she never waits for me to say anything but I smile because Ruby is one of a kind. A special woman in my life.

"Walt it's almost 11:30 don't forget you are having lunch with your daughter today."

"Just wrapping things up." I haven't spent much time with Cady except a hit and miss here and there discussing Henry's case but she called me and said she needed to see me and I won't miss any more opportunities to spend time with my baby girl.

I place my O'Farrell on my dome with precision, throw on my jacket, and head out to the Busy Bee.

"Hi, Sheriff. Cady is at the back table waiting for you."

"Thanks." I turn up the corners of my mouth in quick acknowledgment.

"Hi, punk." I light up at seeing her. What a beautiful and smart woman she has become. I am so proud of her defending her Godfather.

"Hi, Dad".

I kiss her on the cheek. She feels the white thread holding my jacket sleeve together from Chance's 9mm. She looks at me with concern but doesn't say a word.

"What's up."

"Dad, I think there's something going on in Henry's case that I can quite figure out. There are too many odd things happening and I don't want to be an alarmist but you know there's too much riding on this for me to make mistakes."

"Like what"

"Well, I just got back from an informal hearing with the judge and they are moving up Henry's trial date from 6 weeks to 2 weeks. Well, that doesn't just happen. I don't know Dad my instincts are telling me something is off but I don't know what."

"Why did they say they were moving it up?"

"The detective would be out of state"

"So why not delay it until her returns?"

"Exactly. I don't know what is going on."

"They are talking about Fales, right?"

"Yes, I assume so."

I sit and soak in the words.

"Oh, I ordered you a chicken salad sandwich. Hope you don't mind. I am starving."

"No, no. That's good. Thanks, punk"

"Cady, it's always bothered me that Fales never took any time to investigate your Mom's murder. None at all. "

"Did you ever ask him about it?"

"Yeah, he said it wasn't his case."

"Did you believe him?"

"I don't know if I did or didn't you know. I had so much on my mind. When you went to Denver did he say anything to you?"

"Just about the $700.00 and Mom's purse but he never indicated he was investigating Mom's case."

"This whole thing just stinks."

"Dad, what are we going to do?"

"Dunno."

Our food comes and with it a fresh brewed glass of iced tea. I suck down the first one and my glass is quickly refilled. I sit and stare at my sandwich and slowly start to eat. My stomach is tight with anxiety and the burdens I carry. I let Martha down. I let Henry down. I let Branch down. I haven't protected any one of them. I start to take a bite of my sandwich but my throat closes with tightness. I take a deep breath and look down at my plate then back up to Cady.

"Dad, are you ok?"

"Yeah, just disappointed."

She looks quizzically. "Disappointed?"

"Yeah, with myself and this whole situation."

"You are doing everything you can do."

"I need to think."

"That's what we are doing."

"No, I need to just think"

"Finish your sandwich. I know you aren't taking care of yourself. Then you can go think." Cady pauses, " I remember when I was little how you would go off on your own and think. Mom, would say it was so we could have girl time and we would paint our nails and play with our hair. You know it wasn't until I was much older that I figured out that Mom did that so I wouldn't think you didn't want to be with us, to be with me, because you kinda like to be alone when you have so much going on. You never really let us into the inner sanctum."

I look up at Cady hearing the story for the first time and feel just a bit more grateful for the wondrous woman I loved and a lot more guilty for having failed her.

"Come with me?"

"What?" Cady is a taken aback.

"Come..let's go for a drive…"

"k"

I drop down a $20 on the table and we walk across the street and hop in the Bullet. The cab is silent. Nothing is said between us and I hit the open road. I drive, laying down the miles, until I get into the empty vast space. No noise. My mind mimics my surroundings. Clarity, so I can connect the dots but feeling so much better because Cady is by my side.


	17. Counting Coup -- Final Theory

_**Ok, kids this is my final chapter until the finale and my best theory on who is behind Martha's murder. Have fun picking it apart and we will all know in just 4 short days. In the meantime, I can start thinking about more Walt/'Vic shipping...lol...I look forward to reading what you have to say. Enjoy.**_

I break the silence, "This is it, punk. This is what I do. Nothing fantastic. Just me and Wyoming." I pause, "and now you and it makes it just a bit better, Cady."

Cady smiles at me and takes my hand. "Thanks, Dad. I really do love you, you know." I look over and smile at my beautiful daughter.

"Vic and I have put some pieces together and I'm worried that some of it may…well…Cady…it may..um…hurt you and I don't want to do that."

"What are you talking about? You have to tell me."

"I don't want you talking to anyone about this. No one." I look over to make sure she understands.

"ok, you are scaring me."

"I mean too because it is the sort of information that can get you killed. Don't discuss it ."

"ok."

"I think Barlow is involved in your mom's murder somehow."

I recount to Cady the theory that Vic and I have developed and Cady sits in silence and listens.

"Dad, do you think Branch knows?"

"Yes."

"That would explain a lot of things."

"Like Branch giving you a 100 thousand dollar check?"

Cady looks over to me her eyes moistening.

"I'm sorry, Cady. I really am."

"Well, you didn't raise a stupid daughter. I didn't have a choice I had to get Henry out of jail but Dad, Branch gives me a 100 thousand dollar check and he never proposed to me. So really, how much does he love me, if in fact he does, or how much is guilt? He never did anything to me that would warrant that much guilt." She chuckles a bit in nervousness and embarrassment as the reality of the situation hits her.

"I think Ridges did capture his soul if you will but I also think that Branch is not just fighting to kill Ridges for his singular revenge."

"What are you saying, Dad?"

"I think Ridges killed Miller Beck and that Branch knows."

"How would he?"

"I don't know Cady. I don't know but I can see Branch trying to do the right thing in all of this and not hurt you in the process." Silence fills the cab of the truck once again.

"Dad, I know Barlow isn't exactly your best friend but would he really hurt mom?"

"It's logical."

"Dad, have you abandoned your thought that it was someone trying to get back at you and not necessarily mom's involvement with the casino?"

"I don't think I have excluded anything but all roads lead me to him."

"Ok, who else is as powerful as Barlow with a motive to hurt you or mom?"

I pause, "Jacob Nighthorse."

"I thought he was a front for the Cheyenne.? He's not Cheyenne."

"You think he is a puppet on a string, huh?"

"Yeah, I do."

"Well, the obvious question is who is pulling the strings?"

Again, silence.

"Dad, I have to tell you something. Henry told me that Malachi knew that his trial date had been pushed up. How would he know that? He has to be connected, Dad. He has to be."

I ponder Henry's conversation under the fireman's rain cloud of water as the Red Pony was being extinguished about Malachi and I start thinking about the money. Lucian, always taught me to follow the money. Money more than women bring down the powerful. That was Lucian's motto.

"Barlow, is about money. Malachi is about money."

"Dad, do you think they know each other?"

"Dunno. I wouldn't really know, punk and if they were it would be about the casino I would think. Malachi will never forgive me for arresting him and ruining his empire on the Rez. Maybe, I never knew how big that empire was?"

"Well, he offered to pay Henry cash for the Red Pony and he bought all the artifacts. Who has that kind of money after being in jail?"

"Hmmmm" I rub my gnarled knuckles over my unshaven face and throat. Cady has given me a lot to think about and I know that all of this dangerous. It goes against my grain to discuss this with Vic much less my daughter but Vic is a cop and Martha is Cady's mom. Two facts that are irrevocable. I just have to be sure I can protect them both.

"The other thing I've been thinking is that Miller Beck's murder has nothing to do with your mom but nothing leads me to believe that is true."

"I've thought of that too, Dad ever since our conversation last summer after I saw Fales. I've also thought that whomever killed Beck probably didn't know about you and Henry being in Denver. That Henry was icing on the cake."

"Maybe, Branch found out all of this because of his connection with Nighthorse and it made him just a bit more crazy a bit more driven. Dad, he's not himself and something like this would drive him crazy?"

"It could be, Cady. I just don't know but my bigger question right now is whether Nighthorse or Barlow would be willing to kill your mom or have her killed? It's not an honorable thing to do and while they may not be good men are they dishonorable men?"

There is silence between us as we think and soak in the quietness of the desolate Wyoming highway.

"Which would explain, Malachi. I don't think he is to honorable after what Henry experienced in Tri-County Jail. I saw what they did to him."

"Henry was with me when I arrested him. "

"Well, there you go but why didn't Denver P.D. investigate Mom's murder the right way? Her file is nearly barren. They didn't try to find Miller Beck. It seems like Fales was only interested in getting you and Henry. Do you think Fales could be a dirty cop?"

"Nothing and I mean nothing would surprise me at this point. I'm taking you back to the Red Pony. Keep your eyes and ears open and your mouth shut. The only person you can talk to about this is me. I don't want Henry to be more exposed than he needs to be and sometimes knowing nothing is better. If I never called him to help me in Denver he wouldn't be wearing an ankle bracelet now. I have to carry the weight of this. I can't share it with him or anybody really. I don't want you doing anything, Cady. This is how it has to be."

"But you're not in this alone. I mean you talked to Vic."

"It's a bit different with Vic but she was rather insistent if you know what I mean."

Cady, sort of paused, "Yeah, I know what you mean. She is good to have on your side. That much I do know."

"Listen, if Malachi is involved and if Fales is dirty and mixed up in this we can't chance anything. I won't chance someone else that I love being hurt."

I looked over at her, more serious and firm than I have ever been, and her face lowered, "I understand. It doesn't mean I'm not scared for you but I trust you more than anyone in this world. I don't expect to be an orphan so please just promise me you will be careful."

"I promise."

I pause for a moment as I think to myself, afraid to say it out loud to my daughter that if this is all true, it means that Martha's murder is 100% my fault. If I hadn't done the Feds job for them she wouldn't have been killed. My gold star was paid for with her blood. How can I ever be forgiven for that? I silently make another promise to Martha that I won't rest until justice is administered. I won't rest until those responsible are held to answer.

I swear.


	18. Ashes to Ashes (Finale)

**_This is a brief emotional recap of the finale. Thank you for sticking with me throughout the season. Your follows and reviews have made this so worthwhile. I promise I will continue to write more Walt/Vic ships during the hiatus as ideas inspire me. You are all amazing. Thank you._**

The cumulus clouds overhead match my mood as I drive my abandoned Bronco back toward town. On the open road, I see Branch, and without exchanging soliloquies of grandeur, I just show him the facts. David Ridges is dead. At least I can end this part of his personal nightmare. The lead dog doing what the lead dog is supposed to do. At the station, I have to act as Sheriff, not as a man, and inform him of his suspension. For the second time in as many weeks, I agonize over Vic's concern for yet another wound of battle and find myself apologizing and making excuses unlike I ever have before. In unspoken terms, I need to assure Vic that she is still safe with me regardless of how injured I may be; she is of paramount importance as my pain bridges our tenderness. We interweave the lines and boundaries of Sheriff and Deputy and become simply a man and a woman.

I am on a path for justice. I am on a path to seek truth. All of the lies are beginning to flesh themselves out and the dots begin to connect. As Vic gently cleanses the blood on my face, the familiarity of her touch is comforting. So much so, that I do not frame it within the context of my surroundings. She has become a part of me.

The love and loyalty of my best friend strengthens me when I feel I can go no further. His trust, his earnestness are measures of my worth as a mortal man. Righting the wrong, the wrong that I forced upon him, restored my soul.

Saying good-bye. My Martha needs to rest. Her spirit free from anguish. She is returned to the earth as it was: and her spirit shall return to God who gave it. The messenger has spoken these words of comfort to my soul. My quest for justice will not end. I will not stop. My love for her is complete and purified by the blood of my brow.


End file.
